Kquvien's Iyengar Yoga

2012-01-19T06:08:00.001-05:00

Gotta keep practicing...

Sutras on the Horizon

2012-01-19T05:58:00.002-05:00

Before I put the sutras down, give me a moment to bitch.

I know some of you don't give a good hoot about chanting the sutras, and whatever, that's your freedom as a human. I have also heard from some of you that even if you personally are unable to chant all of them perfectly, you still find something calming and centering about sitting up straight with your eyes closed and chest lifted while the chanting takes place. And finally, I know some of you truly enjoy the chanting, and the lessons that the Sutras of Patanjali have for all of us. That said, chanting takes time. If you truly want to chant, please make a point to get to the Wednesday class at least 10 minutes early. On Sunday mornings, please, please, please try to be there at 10 minutes before 9AM. I know it's early, but I have quite a drive in myself and manage to get there in plenty of time, so suck it up.
Okay, that's done, here's the sutras.

1.20 sraddhaa virya smrti samaadhiprajna purvakah itaresam

Practice must be pursued with trust, confidence, vigor, keen memory and the power of absorption to break this spiritual complacency.

It is of interest to read the sutra that precedes this one.
In this state (this state being a level of samadhi, absorption in practice), one may experience bodilessness, or become merged in nature. This may lead to isolation or to a state of loneliness.

Some of the translations and commentaries pose that Patanjali is actually addressing those who have evolved highly in their practice. So much so to the point that true states of samadhi have been experienced.
I believe that even those of us who are young in our yoga practice can experience more prosaic states of samadhi.

Have you ever come up from Savasana, or down from Sarvangasana, feeling completely at peace, the mind blank, simply a body with a consciousness housed within, but free from mundane bondages?

Then again, have you ever felt completely isolated and alone in your quest for not simply better health and more flexible hamstrings, but something deeper that cannot be touched, explained, much less purchased?

We all need to have confidence and strength when we feel that no one else can possibly understand us, because truly that's our asmita (ego) craving the special individuality that yoga often wipes away. Samadhi, absorption, is a loss of individuality and a joining with everything else that breathes and lives in the universe. It is natural to feel any amount of merging or isolation, acceptance or resistance through the long course of a life long yoga practice.

2.31 jati desa kaala samaya anavacchinnaah sarvabhaumah mahaavratam

Yamas are the great, mighty, universal vows, unconditioned by place, time and class.

If you do not know what the Yamas are, then look them up.

Simply put, this sutra is telling you that it does not matter who you are or how important you may think you are, you are not excluded from the basic rules of humanity. Be good.

Class Chanting

2012-01-10T07:38:00.002-05:00

I have added a separate page with all of the sutras we have chanted in class. So, if you scroll all the way down to the bottom there is a little list that says"pages" click on the one that says "class sutras" and there you go.
Feel free to print it out and bring a copy to class if you like.

2012-01-05T15:10:00.003-05:00

There are some things about India that I can honestly say, will never cease to fascinate me. Seeing animals hauling carts along side motorized vehicles is definitely one of them. I do wish that this particular beast was not so under fed, however.

Questions

2012-01-05T07:27:00.002-05:00

Yoga is the stopping of the fluctuations of the consciousness.
Yogas citta vrtti nirodhah. That's the second sutra of Patanjali's Yoga Sutras. That's his definition of yoga.

When we are practicing asana, even when we are in a class under the watchful eye of a teacher, we should be attempting to put a stop to the mind chatter.
In class, most questions are mind chatter.
Instead of concentrating our attention on the particular action or area, we get to a point, let a question pop up and , that's it, the focus is blown. For some reason, most of us are okay with this process. Why is one thread of mind chatter permitted over another, simply because it is put in the form of a question?

Patanjali also tells us that we humans are tormented by afflictions. The first two and most prominent being ignorance and ego, avidya and asmita.
Our mind chatter is often the product of our avidya and asmita.

When a question comes to mind in class, it should become part of our self study, our svadhyaya. Unless, of course it is something shattering. For example, "Should my shin bone have broken through my skin? "
Or, "Is it normal to have been stricken blind by that last action?"
That means we should use our memory correctly, store the question, go home to try the asana again with that question in mind, open a book and see if greater gurus before us have anything to offer on the topic.
Instead, we lose our sense of pratyahara (controlling and withdrawing the senses from the external world) and we open our mouths.
We do this because we think that our question is somehow of import, and sometimes it is, but more often than not, it is a question that need not be vocalized.
We may even have the answer deep within ourselves, but it so much easier for another person to hand us something than it is for us to take a moment, concentrate and make a crazy face while we dig into the depths of our consciousness for the answer.
The asmita(ego) is so strong in us that we are convinced that our curiousity is justified, even intelligent.

Is this muscle supposed to hurt?
Where exactly should I be placing this hand?
Do it again and find out for yourself.
Then do it again and find out something else.
Then do it again and find out the same thing or still something new.
Then do it again.
We seem to think that we deserve satisfaction, even if it means interrupting the flow of the class and the teacher.

The more I work, the more insignificant my efforts appear to be.
I have to be content with this divine discontent which drives me on.
BKS Iyengar

Turn your dissatisfaction into fuel for motivation.

But, truly, which is ultimately more rewarding, discovering something for yourself after sweating through it for some time or having the answer verbally pushed through the air at you by your teacher? We can be so impatient sometimes.

I think again of what Zubens said about gurus on Guru Purnima in Pune this summer.

" A guru is not someone who gives us answers, but rather, asks us more questions which encourage us to seek the answers."

A true yoga practice is not something that can be purchased. It is something that is earned through hard work. Your teacher is not a customer service representative, standing there to hand out information. Think of your teacher more like a tour guide in a vast, wild place that changes moment to moment. There is no end destination on the tour, and it's not always a lovely vacation spot. At times we are forced to dwell in scummy neighborhoods to clean up some long left trash heap before moving along to a more preferable locale.

2012-01-05T07:18:00.001-05:00

So, here's Pincha Mayurasana, dropping over into Viparita Dandasana.
Keep your eyes on my upper back as I begin to take my feet over. It is clearly visible that the shoulder blades and back ribs are not digging in deep enough. Yet.

2012-01-02T16:45:00.000-05:00

This dude was hanging out at the beginning of the 200 steps that lead up to Jeguri Temple. The goods in his hands are some colored pastes that he dipped a little stamp into before pressing it on our foreheads.

2012-01-02T16:41:00.002-05:00

I don't know why, but I found this old Coke truck strangely attractive. I don't even drink Coke.

Just Dance

2012-01-01T09:25:00.000-05:00

My New Year's resolution is to post on my blog and dance more. It seems lately, those are 2 things I don't do enough of.
I try to do a decent job at whatever I do. Making a New Year's resolution seems somehow odd to me. A starting date for doing something good or healthy, an end date for some bad habit. Not to sound like a shoe advertisement, but just do it.

There is a difference between preparation and procrastination.

So, here I am posting on my blog and I starting boogeying pretty fervently the other day, and then again the day after that, so I think I am off to a good start. The fact that I haven't been posting or dancing lately is because I have been wound too tightly of late.
About 4 months ago, I was lucky to get sick enough that it required major medication and major diet change. For the first 3 weeks of the adventure, the drugs made me sick and the diet changes made me feel like an alien. I would stand in the isle of a grocery store gazing around at all the packaged foods, wondering, who are the people who can eat this stuff? Not me.
In the last 4 months I have had no gluten, no sugar in any form, no rice, no fruit, no juice, no alcohol, no beans, no nuts and no fun.
I allowed myself to put 'things I do for fun' on the same level with 'things I eat'. Presently, I feel pretty good and I am used to the diet, I even like it. But for the first month it was so hard. I became depressed. I refused contact with my friends. Surely, I thought, they won't want to deal with me, a social retard who won't even eat a cracker.
I am a loud, obnoxious, tattooed goofball who does not embarrass easily, and I thought diet change was going to be the friendship breaker. Jack ass.
Now, having turned a corner, I realize I was being judgemental and arrogant to think that the people I have surrounded myself with are so small and petty that they base their friendship with me on diet.
I clearly was not my usual self. I became very tired of talking about it. I had trouble making eye contact with students in classes. I think talking about an experience or problem can be healing up to a point. But how much is concern and how much is curiousity from those inquiring? I felt like I was digging a hole that had no purpose. I believe that we should not treat the people in our lives like some reality television show that satisfies some gruesome fascination. We should be there to help them.
Finally around the third month of eating such a rigid diet, I began to feel better. I started waking up without my alarm clock. An interesting side effect was an amazing freedom in my joints. Always a little cranky from an old injury, my right knee stopped popping at the slightest turn or bend.
So, now, I'm feeling pretty good. For the most part I enjoy my crazy diet.
I'll make a point to post more often, as long as it is interesting and of substance.
And most importantly, I began dancing New Year's Eve with no intention of stopping.

2011-12-20T14:52:00.000-05:00

Apollo is making steady improvements with his yoga practice. Seriously, he gets better at it everyday. At the beginning of the practice, he's totally wired, which I find actually kind of helpful, especially if I am feeling lazy or unmotivated. As the practice continues, our rajas and tamas begin to balance out, almost compliment each other, until we are both in a sattvic state, much like you see in the photo.

2011-12-09T08:14:00.001-05:00

Pranayama

2011-12-07T07:37:00.001-05:00

I remember my first couple of days in India this past July.
Jet lag had not yet worn off and I walked around in a daze of sorts. Fighting to stay awake in the middle of the day, gulping down lots of chai for the caffeine and falling asleep around 9pm, only to rouse, wide awake at 2am.
It was about 2am my third or second morning there that I crawled from my flat Indian bed onto my sticky mat to practice something close to pranayama. The apartment actually had a couple of bolsters that worked great for laying over and opening the chest. I remember very clearly my first Indian Ujjayi of that trip. As I inhaled to expand my chest and rib cage, I felt 20+ hours of airplane stiffness smooth away. As I exhaled I felt the anxiety and panic that comes from being in a crazy place and having an irregular sleep pattern transform into calm, content acceptance.
I remember being so grateful that this art of pranayama exists, so grateful that somewhere along the line, my teachers actually looked at me and then decided to teach it to me anyway, regardless of my jackassness.
It's a simple thing, taking a smooth breath with awareness, but it can have such a profound effect.

Pranayama was not always like that for me. For the first 3 years of my Iyengar practice, my pranayama practice usually turned into nap time. Even in classes, with a firm resolve to stay awake, my own small snores would often wake me. But, like anything, if you practice and keep an open mind, you can find a way to make it work. Once I stopped falling asleep and actually stayed awake, I found it annoying, frustrating, sometimes even maddening. Tension would push from the inside of me, feeling like I was going to boil over and explode into a Kquvien mess. I would become frightened and panic.

Should I get up and run around? Maybe I should just start coughing, or fake a sneezing fit. What should I do? Where should I go?
Luckily, the asana practice that was instilled in me kicked in.
Certainly, before I get up and start running around the room, I should just lift my chest. Wow. That was a great idea, so great in fact, that I should do it again. Oh, as my awareness to lift my chest is awakening, I would realize that I was gripping my jaw muscles, okay, no problem, exhale, relax those muscles. As I continued with the physical adjustments, I would lose the anxiety, lose the feeling of needing to dash around, waving my arms and screaming. Somewhere in all of that I felt every now and then, the lovely result of an invigorating inhale and the calming touch of letting the body and mind soften with an exhale.
I never would have been able to do it without the lessons my asana practice taught me.

I can honestly say that it took me 10 years of Iyengar yoga practice before I felt like I was actually doing pranayama.

2011-11-26T16:22:00.001-05:00

2011-11-26T16:21:00.001-05:00

Here's Steve!

2011-11-26T16:20:00.001-05:00

The thali plate at Rupali. Delicious.

2011-11-26T16:18:00.001-05:00

Look at the Ganesh shrine in amongst the shopping stalls. The prosaic and the sacred going hand in hand.

Gorakasana

2011-11-25T06:34:00.001-05:00

I have been practicing this pose for about a year now. At least 2 or 3 times a week. I am finding that it is a pose that can fit easily into almost any kind of practice. It's great before backbends because of the opening demanded in the lower abdomen and front groins, as well as the thighs. This pose also requires a tremendous amount of muscular work in the lower back to get the sacrum pressed in.
Before forward bendings, this pose also works just peachy, getting the knees, ankles and hips warmed up.

I still have yet to balance freely for more than 10 seconds here and there. No worries, though, I am growing to love this pose, truly.

Urdhva Kukkutasana

2011-11-25T06:26:00.001-05:00

The poses are coming along much better than my video recording skills. Don't hurt your neck while you're watching this one, since I somehow managed to record it flipped over.

2011-10-22T09:18:00.000-04:00

Every moment, unfathomable, all the while bubbling with bizarre, strange spasmodic and unpredictable activities-this is mind.
Prashant S. Iyengar, Discourses on Yog

Prashant

2011-10-21T17:39:00.002-04:00

When I was in India just a few months ago for July, I gained a new appreciation for Prashant, Mr. Iyengar's son.

Prashant demands that we ask ourselves deep questions that have no definite answer.
I left his classes with more questions and a sense of vast openness. A sense that nothing and everything were available to me simultaneously if I only allowed my mind, allowed my normal outlook, what I everyday think of as 'me', to fall away. As soon as I found myself saying"I do it this way", or "that's not how I do this", I was going down the wrong road of self- definition, further and further from the vast expanse of divinity and freedom.
For what are we but slaves to our own frustrations, irritations and spells of impatience? We hold fast to our whims for new boots, fur ponchos and constantly seek a sense of final satisfaction. We lie to ourselves to make ourselves feel like we are intelligent and justified in our daily nonsense, but really we feel no real sense of completion. Instead, there is more loss, more emptiness, and we start out anew, looking toward some other object of desire, be it material or emotional to keep our ego pleased.

One class in particular has continued to have the most impact on me.

Prashant was asking us if we were 'correcting our pose' or if we 'made a correction' to the pose. He asked us to find out if we were in a state of constant correcting or if we felt like a correction had been made. "Are you doing or are you done?'

The entire class moved along with these questions being thrown out at us over and over again. When do you feel "done', what is "done"?

"How do you define done?"
"How do you decide it is correct?"

What is a correct pose?
What does it mean to be doing a pose 'correctly'?
To a certain extent there exists a level of incorrectness. Certainly, if the shoulders roll forward in Tadasana, that's an incorrect action. Depending on the shoulders, depending on the physical vessel, there may be a sway toward correctness or incorrectness. Does the state depend more on effort? What if the effort is great, but mis-directed?
Is there an absolute correct and incorrect?
I tend to think it has to vary from person to person, body to body. What our ego and our mind tells us cannot always be reliable. Sometimes our body speaks Greek, while we, for whatever reason, translate it as Spanish. Then we meet a teacher who understands Greek, informs us of our ignorance, and we either accept or reject the notions.

"The absolutes of right and wrong can never be absolute, because they are alive. Truth is worth caring about because it gives meaning to our lives, but we must watch for the high moral ground and use non-violence as a tool for connectivity and appreciation instead of divisiveness or puritanical authority."
from Yoga for a World Out of Balance by Michael Stone

Prashant would conduct an entire class without giving one instruction about a leg, a muscle or the spine. We were never told to straighten anything or tuck the tailbone. He expects that you are already in a place in your practice where you are aware of the basic doings and undoings, as well as your own shortcomings. I found it refreshing to discover that years of physical practice have finally begun to manifest somewhere beyond the physical, muscular realm for me. I was able to maintain the basics of the pose and still explore the breath, the state of mind, the concept of correct and incorrect.

I've decided to stop looking for the correct pose. Perhaps the correct pose is simply just another object of desire, when attained, we give ourselves an imaginary trophy on our mental award shelf. Can I just practice, uninterrupted, devoted to improving, devoted to evolving, without the trophy? I hope so.

The undisciplined man is attached to the fruits of his action and is in bondage to the desire that causes them. But the disciplined man abandons the fruits of his actions and thereby attains abiding peace.

For the delights that arise from external objects are really wombs of misery. They have a beginning and an end, Arjuna. A wise man takes no pleasure in them.
from The Bhagavad Gita translated by George Thompson

We should not be treating asana like an external object of desire to be attained and displayed. Asana is our laboratory, where our fears, frustrations and weaknesses are laid out before us to re-formulate.

2011-10-20T17:28:00.002-04:00

2011-10-20T17:26:00.001-04:00

The folks in India are either frightened or fascinated by all the tattoos on my skin. The ones who are frightened look away, have trouble making eye contact and are clearly disapproving.

Now, the folks who are fascinated and interested come straight at me smiling with their arms reaching out to touch me. They rub my arms, pull my hands up in the air and ask question after question. If they have a cellphone or camera, a photo is a must.

I will never forget a lady from my first trip in 2009.

"No wash?' she asked, meaning, they won't wash off.
"No wash." I confirmed.
She laughed, I laughed.
"Well", she said, "I hope you like them!"

2011-10-20T17:19:00.004-04:00

2011-10-20T17:17:00.002-04:00

2011-10-20T17:15:00.004-04:00

2011-10-20T17:15:00.001-04:00

2011-10-20T17:14:00.001-04:00

One of the many, many tan colored street dogs.

2011-10-12T07:48:00.004-04:00

Exorcising demons.

Fungal Adventures

2011-10-11T07:34:00.000-04:00

So, I've been kind of sick lately.

I've learned that sickness has an effect on practice.

I've learned that practice has an effect on sickness.

I was unfortunate enough to contract a fungal infection. There are a vast array of unpleasant details that fall under the broad description of "fungal infection". If you're reading this, it means that I probably know you and like you, so I will spare the gory details.

Unfortunately, I have dealt with this wide spread fungal panic before, more times that I care to remember. Months of diet and life alteration ensue, sometimes to no positive end.

Is it that my entire body has become completely absorbed with this overgrown fungus? Has it truly embedded itself into my organs, causing me to become sick, depressed and exhausted?

Or is the infection more localized to a single area, with such a unique and hardy strain that whatever tries to kill it, only makes it stronger?

Or, am I so miserable that I am perpetuating this condition with my negativity?

Or, am I simply completely insane, to the point that this entire experience is my imagination, not a true reality at all?

What is true reality anyway?

All of the above?

In 15 days, I shed 10 pounds.

Feeling desperate, I took the counsel of my doctor. Her regimen includes a very controlled diet, where a small selection of foods combine in certain ways. The next part of this regimen includes a long usage of a heavy duty anti-fungal pharmaceutical. I took a loading dose of the drug 4 days in a row, then follow that up with a smaller dose every 10 days to kill off any straggling fungi.

A day or so after the loading dose was over, I felt like complete crap. I felt so horrible that I didn't eat a speck of food for 2 whole days and starting writing a last will and testament. The drug kicked my ass.
The last time I felt like I was truly dying was almost 20 years ago. I had a second round of inhalation poisoning from paint fumes. When I felt like death was at hand, I put on my favorite album (at that time, it was Led Zeppelin) and laid down in the dark. This time, I was a little disappointed with the whole death scenario, because my headache was so bad, that I did not even want to die to my favorite song, I just wanted it all to end.

So, I wrote a will, laid down in the dark, with no music and went to sleep. I didn't die. I woke up feeling a little better, and repeated this routine for a few days.
Now I am walking around feeling better, but weird. Has the medication I'm taking caused me to feel so different? Is there a loss of fungus? Did my body adopt the fungus, consider it a loved, integral part to the point that learning to exist without it would make me feel this odd?

My practice has become different. New sensations stream through my limbs as I do the asanas. Aches and pains as well as positive opening, expansive feelings come upon me in places and poses like never before. What was once stabilizing is now disturbing. It's kind of exciting. I always say that the body is a product of nature, and I am intrigued to be presently experiencing that. I am exorcising demons.
The inversions have become more difficult. I am sequencing poses together differently. They feel different. They start differently, they end differently, but it's all good. If I resist the change, it will only become more painful.

2011-10-01T19:08:00.001-04:00

Here's Chris O'Brien and our friend Kara from Montreal with Granni.

2011-10-01T19:06:00.004-04:00

2011-10-01T09:03:00.001-04:00

This is Granni, the elephant (obviously). This photo was taken on my second encounter with her. When I first got this close to her, honestly, she scared the crap out of me. She's big.
The smiling Indian dude who strolled along beside her encouraged me to pet her. "Really?"
He laughed, bobbled his head from side to side and said, "Oh, yes, yes!"
So, as you can see from the photo, I touched her. When I have told people this story, they asked me if she had scratchy skin, they asked me if afterwards my hand might have smelled like an elephant.
Oddly, I didn't notice any of those external factors.
As corny as this may sound, as soon as my hand touched Granni, a wave of love passed through my arm into me. To me, she had the most beautiful eyes that reflected the gentle soul within. I did not want to ever remove my hand from her.
I have only traveled and stayed in India twice. But both times I have noticed how as my days there pass, my affection for the place deepens. What at first seems filthy and unorganized, becomes lived in and well-worn.
After I reluctantly took my hand off of Granni and walked home, I started hatching schemes in my mind.
Surely, I should skip class at the Institute tomorrow so that I might find this elephant again. After all, what's wrong with spending my day wandering the streets of Pune with an elephant?

I decided to leave the memory the sweet one that it is.

2011-09-23T07:52:00.000-04:00

2011-09-23T07:50:00.003-04:00

These folks were taking a break when I happened upon them. The gravel you see them sitting upon started from a pile of bigger rocks just about 50 feet away from this frame. The ladies use the hammers to bash the bigger rocks into this smaller gravel. Then, they fill those plates you see at the edge of the pile, place them on their heads and gracefully walk over to this pile. Note that the ladies are wearing head wraps so the plates sit on their crowns easier. I love that they wear these beautiful saris while they are working.

2011-09-21T13:34:00.000-04:00

Dwi Pada Koundinyasana. An attempt anyway. Crazy that I figured out how to post video...what next?

I remember when I first began practicing this arm balance. 10 years ago, I was working as the do-all clean-up garden and pond caretaker at a Rolls-Royce and Bentley dealership, which is no longer in downtown Atlanta. I would sneak downstairs into the parts cellar, and on a packing blanket spread on the cold concrete floor, fall over and over and over again.

I joked with myself. "I am going to practice my falling now." Really, I see now, I was practicing getting up from the fall.

2011-09-21T07:24:00.003-04:00

2011-09-21T07:23:00.002-04:00

2011-08-24T07:45:00.001-04:00

DSC00985, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

2011-08-15T15:44:00.005-04:00

DSC00957, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

2011-08-15T15:44:00.001-04:00

DSC00978, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Even the dogs cannot escape the turmeric.

2011-08-15T15:43:00.003-04:00

DSC00974, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

2011-08-15T15:43:00.001-04:00

DSC00972, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

2011-08-15T15:42:00.001-04:00

DSC00954, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

We passed many small shrines and statues covered in turmeric on the way up the stairs.

2011-08-15T15:41:00.003-04:00

DSC00960, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Stairs to Jeguri

2011-08-15T15:41:00.001-04:00

DSC00967, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

We climbed up 200 steps to get to the main temple.

Jeguri Temple

2011-08-15T15:40:00.001-04:00

DSC00979, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

This place was crazy. Super crowded, smelled of turmeric and bodily fluids. It was a blast.

Enough

2011-07-28T06:20:00.001-04:00

I've seen enough.
I've smelled enough.
I've bought enough.
I've eaten enough.

I've certainly felt and experienced enough.

I'm ready to be home.

I asked a friend earlier if he was "Pune weary." He has been here a month longer than me. His eyes answered yes, but he was still smiling. Weary does not do my feelings justice. I am, to a certain extent, a more active, fiery personality. I'm fed up. I feel like my whole time here, is a lesson in tolerance, amazing patience and the biggest sense of, "oh well, it's India" ever. Not a day goes by here when that phrase does not get run through my head at least 500 times.

I have been reading a book in my spare time here. A thick book. A gripping, amazing, involving book called Shantaram. It is a true story about a man, Gregory David Roberts, who escapes Australian prison and flees to Mumbai, India. At the beginning of the tale, the main character recounts how all of his new Indian friends tell him he has to "surrender to India" and "give himself to India."

The other night as I lay over a bolster in Prashant's pranayama class, he was asking us to examine the emotions of the inhale and exhale. They both felt tight, stifled, uncomfortable, almost fearful. I cannot surrender and give myself completely to India. Even in the most relaxing moments, I am still holding myself a little bit above the vast ocean of this experience.

It's not that the streets are filthy. It's not that this is an immensely over-populated country where the poverty and suffering is a visible, tangible part of every day life. No matter who you are, or where you go, you will see something that you wish you did not. It's not the language barrier, the smells or the odd looks I get for my white face and tattoo coverage. None of those things really bother me too much.

It's the dogs.

Even if they are untame wild beasts who may rip my leg open, in my eyes they still have the helpless innocence of a creature that is a victim of human negligence. Some of them, I know, see my heart. Just this morning, a big, sweet goofy dog walked right up to me and began whining. There were other people milling about, but he pegged me for the sucker. And he chose correctly. I bought a package of biscuits and put them on the pavement for him. As I walked away, he followed me. He had a limp, patches of hair falling out, and black, sad eyes that stared deep into me.

Each time I see a dog, it is a knife in my chest. Some of them look amazing healthy. Most do not. I have seen dogs that look like walking skeletons, dogs with no hair, dogs with one eye; I saw one poor beast this morning so ravaged by fleas that all his hair was gone and he could not walk properly because of all the scratching he was constantly performing. I could continue this post for lines and lines and lines describing the everyday canine horrors that I have seen and heard. I am chosing to spare both you and myself the agony.

I feel like animal suffering is not something that I should de-sensitize myself to. Do I want to be the kind of person who can look at a helpless creature suffering, feel nothing and not be moved to help? I do not think that I do. So, until this conflict within me reconciles, I cannot give myself fully to this place.

Sunday Off

2011-07-24T05:27:00.000-04:00

I am a firm believer in resting.

A day off can work wonders.

Yesterday, after the morning class, my legs were shaking, my back muscles spasming out and I was cursing the Iyengars for over working all of us. When I showed up for the afternoon open practice session, the hall was practically empty. Little by little, some folks trickled in, but the hall stayed relatively open.

When I came out of rope headstand, my legs gave out underneath me and I very nearly buckled into a heap on the floor. I was exhausted from 3 weeks of listening and working so intently in the classes. This past week of classes was all backbends. I love and enjoy backbending, but after a whole week of pushing myself mentally and physically, I was pooped.

This morning, I woke up and had a liesurely morning. I sat on the little balcony that's covered with hundreds of tiny ants. I watched them move in and out of the apartment with some ant purpose of some sort while I drank coffee. Then myself, Steve, Sara and her really fun Australian friends took a rickshaw to a restaurant for a proper breakfast of fine South Indian food. After that, again into a rickshaw for a trip into the chaos of Laxsmi Road.

Rickshaws are funny little 3 wheeled vehicles that run on lovely smelling diesel fuel. They sound like sputtering airplanes with a nasal toned horn. Most of the rickshaw drivers do not speak much English at all. They drive with a remarkable sense of confident contentment as they weave in, out and around all of the many moving obstacles on the streets. It's like a very smelly, dusty roller coaster ride. For some odd reason, I actually find the rides relaxing.

Laxsmi Road is sort of a down town type of area. It's a sprawling, noisy, chaotic show of shops, food vendors (deadly to my fragile American digestive system) and people, people, people.

I saw an elephant, a three legged dog, a water buffalo, 20,000 motorcycles and 100,000 saris.

I returned back to my lonely apartment; quiet and barren since my Israeli roommates went home yesterday.I realized that my legs were no longer quivering from exhaustion and a scowl with a sound of disgust did not escape me when I re-counted the classes from this past week. I plopped down on some pillows and smiled to myself.

A day off can work wonders.

Guru Purnima

2011-07-16T13:07:00.001-04:00

Yesterday was Guru Purnima. It is a holiday where Gurus themselves and the concept of gurus is honored. So many people packed into the main hall, easily 300. Those who came late and could not cram themselves in poked their head in through a door way, sat on the stairs, or watched the proceedings on a television monitor outside in the courtyard. We were packed into the main hall so tightly that we barely had room for our knees as we sat in simple cross legs. Anytime we had to move a leg, or change position, it was understood, our neighbor was a part of that process. My back got bumped, my hair pulled and my right leg was a knee support for the lady next to me for a time. It was all fine. None of these actions was done out of violence, or even heedlessness, there was simply no other option because it was so crowded. We were all there for the same reason: to pay our respects to Guruji Iyengar, to hear him speak, to be in his prescence and as Zubens put it, "to associate ourselves with him."
Zubens is a lovely individual with a fabulous smile. He was one of the teachers who accompanied Geeta to Portland, Oregon for the teacher's Convention in May of 2010.
Zubens was given the task of orating and basically running the evening function that was Guru Purnima at the Institute. He said something that really resonated with me.

" A guru is not someone who gives us answers, but rather, asks us more questions which encourage us to seek the answers."

That simple comment really had a profound effect on me. It made me examine everything that I feel and perceive here in India, in Pune, at the Ramamani Iyengar Yoga Memorial Institute.

Guruji( Mr.Iyengar) and Geetaji(daughter of Mr. Iyengar), with Zubens statement, became more realistic and tolerable in my eyes.

They are both horrifying and welcoming.
Rude, yet amiable.
Fierce, yet polite.
Cruel and compassionate.
They are everything and nothing simultaneously, they do not hold back.
They do not hold back in their criticism and demands of us, the students; but they also do not hold back their own humanity.
Geeta comes into the hall to teach us, knees wrapped, neck in a brace, coughing, with a water bottle to keep her throat from drying. She allows us to see these things without fear. Perhaps she hopes that we will look at our own shortcomings with a more realistic, and less dramatic eye.
Guruji to me seems full of energy. It's endless. Forget about wishing that I have that much energy at 94, I wish I had that much energy now, at 39.
During his talk to us for Guru Purnima, he told us that we are all tamasic, dull ,lifeless. He told us that we have come to use props as a way to give ourselves support for our laziness, rather than use the props to teach us something about our bodies and our intelligence.
He said all of these things to us with a big beautiful smile on his face. He was not speaking to tell us how impeccably fabulous or disgustingly horrible we are. He was speaking, hoping that we would learn something from his words.

Our guru brings us face to face with the greatest of dualities.
I am strong; no, I am weak.
I am courageous, no, I am terrified.
I am calm; no, I am a nervous wreck.

To gain strength, I have to discover the weakness.
To be brave, I have to fear something first.
To calm myself down, I certainly first have to know what an un-calm state is.

I want to be as close to them as possible, while at the same time, I am horrified by simply being in the same room with them.
Being in the prescence of the Iyengars puts me in a storm of emotions. If I do not work to make this storm subside into a reconciliation of calmness and surrender, then it's over, I'm lost and God only knows where you'll find me.

After the function, the talks of Guru Purnima were concluded, we are given the chance to pay our respects to Guruji and Geetaji. I stand in a small line of people waiting to do this. To each of us, it is of individual importance, and no doubt means something different and yet the same to all of us.

I touch my chest, my heart, I put my hands in prayer position and bow before them as I say thank you. Both Geetaji and Guruji bow in return with the brightest smile in the world. Then I go to my knees and put my forehead on their feet. Geetaji placed her hand on my head as I bowed before her. Such a soft, gentle gesture from such a fierce lady. I love her.

The Iyengars bring my consciousness so close to the breaking point that I have no choice but to heave myself up over the cliff's edge, stand tall and receive their teaching. In the moment it is harsh, painful; but only moments later, breaths later, it is liberating and I experience a freedom and relaxation like nothing ever before.

Hmmm

2011-07-09T04:23:00.000-04:00

Mr. Iyengar is very demanding.
No shock there.

When he starts to yell, a growling quality takes over his voice. He sounds as if he is completely disgusted with us.

You are not doing it!
What's wrong with you?!
Why did you come here if you are not willing to do the work!?
You are not listening!!

My response is to buck up and bust my ass to do what he's asking. Almost, with an "I'll show you, I can do it!" attitude. This attitude is what keeps me away from thoughts like, "oh, what a vicious monster" or "oh for the love of God, get me out of here!"
I think he gets just as exhausted as we do. By the end of class today, by arms were shaking from so much work. New actions and untouched regions in headstand and shoulderstand made me lift up taller than ever before. I'm feeling it now, even with just the simple actions of typing these words.

The interesting and quite lovely thing, is the end of class.
Savasana.
Mr. Iyengar lays over the backbending bench as he tells his granddaughter Abbi how to instruct us in Savasana. Seriously, in only 60 seconds, I felt more deeply relaxed then ever before;especially after doing so much physical work all through class.
In Savasana, the instruction was to let the root of the tongue at the back of the jaw become as thin and soft as the tip of the tongue. At first, my brain rebelled. "What the #/&*? How can I possibly make the root of my tongue thin and soft?" Then I relaxed, brought my attention to the root of my tongue and began to just relax there, and soon thereafter, my jaw muscles relaxed, my eyes felt completely soft and passive while my whole physical form began to settle down to the floor. Then my mind became completely quiet and receptive to even further depths of relaxation. Hmmm. All from listening to the teacher.

City of Vrttis

2011-07-09T04:03:00.000-04:00

Pranayama class at the Institute is very interesting.
This city, Pune, is a very loud place.
The second floor of the Institute, where the classes are held, has a whole wall of wide open windows through which the noises from below, above and beyond float in to asault your ears.
When I laid down over the bolster at the beginning of pranayama class, I was ready to welcome the sense of calmness and yet alertness that working with the breath and feeling its affects can bring. Instead, I found my brain setting to the task of identifying and classifying the noises from outside.

A jack hammer from the construction on a house just next door.

A lady sweeping the sidewalk below, constantly.

Several horns from a wide variety of vehicles being blown off continuously.

So many people shouting.

Dogs barking.

The birds, oh my God, the birds. I like to listen to the differences between the crows and the hornbills.

How much time went by before I realized Geeta was instructing us to do something? What was it? I am sure it had nothing to do with what was going on outside.

Be with your exhalation.
Feel what happens to your arms as you exhale.
Let the exhale be smooth- dog fight. What's that about? Is it any of the dogs that were out there earlier, I hope- stop. Right, exhale.

As you inhale, feel the inhale and the energy move up the inside of the trunk.
Be on the inside of the trunk only, do not lift the shoulders -a cat started wailing. Was it that cute calico cat I saw just before class started? Is it fighting with another cat? -stop, right, inhale.

This process went on for probably about 30 minutes. Each time a noise intruded, I had to make the effort to stop the train of thoughts that would become a rambling story. I had to train myself to simply hear the noise and make that be the end of the process.

More dogs barking-Intrusion.
Two ladies screaming at eachother- Intrusion.
car horns, truck horns, motorcycle horns- Intrusion.

At last, I came to a place where the sounds were existing and I was existing, but I was with me, not them. What was the need really, of labeling and classifying these inconsequential sounds?

Then I realized that everything makes noise, nothing that is alive is completely silent.
The sound of my breath was like a gentle breeze. My body made little noises as different areas released and settled towards the floor. My eyelids released towards my eyelashes, and a small sound escaped the flesh there as they became smoother. Little by little, the noises from outside me and inside me began to join together. There was no more distinction between the barking dog and the releasing eyelid. It all came together to produce a vibration that I used to further relax myself.
This may be so simply because I had no other choice. What was I to do? Lay there, classifying odd fragments of city sounds with an occasional in breath for good measure? What good is that? Certainly not worth the cash I laid out for the plane ride over here.
At one point, I thought I couldn't do it. Surely, I thought to myself, I should just get up and dash out of here before Geeta has a chance to yell at me. There were a few moments like that; where I tormented myself with indecision and lack of confidence.
Not only is Samshaya(doubt, fear, loss of hope) miserable, it's boring. Tapas(self-discipline, burning desire to improve yourself) is so much more exciting.

The Simple Things

2011-07-05T03:05:00.000-04:00

When I got to the main hall for practice this morning, it was jammed full of folks. So crowded! I found enough space to put a mat down, although I had to keep it folded in half. I was able to work in this small amount of space for most of my poses. When I was doing leg lifts, my feet were landing just above someone else's legs and with my arms over head, my hands were situated underneath someone else as she did standing poses. Despite this, we all managed okay.
Practicing in a room with this many people is kind of like the heavily trafficed roads here in India. You must be calm and alert at all times, watching out for those around you while staying in complete control of your own movements. If you space out for even a moment, disaster may occur.
About half way through my practice, I was seized by the urge to urinate. The bathroom at the Institute is pretty nasty. There are 2 stalls, one with a regular American toilet, the other with an Indian squat toilet. The floor is wet with a layer of water mixed with pee and the whole bathroom smells like pee as well. They ask that you wash your hands and feet after using the bathroom, but there are no soaps or towels provided to do so. This means that once you have relieved yourself, and splashed your nether parts with water, rinsed your hands and feet off with water, you are a sopping wet mess. Hands, feet and pants are all wet and they like you to try and dry off before you trek back upstairs into the main hall. This whole process could take up to 10, maybe 15 minutes.
Knowing all this is in store, I decided to see how long I could hold it. Finally, wanting to practice more abdominals meant I was going to have to suck it up and use the restroom. By that time, I was about to wet my bloomers. I rushed downstairs to the bathroom to find a line of 4 people. No way.
I dashed across the street to my apartent, thankfully drained my bladder and finished my practice in my bedroom.No worries.

Where Am I? Here I am.

2011-07-04T05:33:00.001-04:00

I flew from Atlanta to Newark, from Newark to Belgium, and from Belgium flew to Mumbai. Then from Mumbai, I got in a car and rode for 3 more hours onto Pune. On the ride over, I saw some cows milling around the street, lots of dogs almost get flattened by traffic , a few people sleeping on the sidewalk and some men pissing on the street while all of this went on around them.
India.
I arrived in Pune at 3 am India time. I am still adjusting. Jet lag symptoms for me are fatigue (obviously), nausea, dizziness, light headedness and nervousness. Jetlag brings upon me the feeling of being isolated and outcast in a strange place where I will find no help, no comfort. Not to mention an overwhelming feeling of emptiness at being apart from my husband and animal family.
I feel like I am settling in a little bit now that a week has passed by. My body is very aware that it is on the other side of the globe. Sleeping when it should be awake and walking around, trying to function when it is normally slumbering. Connecting with people, especially folks that I know from other workshops, etc, really helps me feel like I am not a lonely freak, wandering about a chaotic, unfriendly land. It seems that most folks go through an over all feeling of discombobulation after so much traveling. The great thing about dis- combobulation is the re- combobulation.

I have run into some fabulous folks who have helped me out with simple things, even though they met the world to me at the time. My friend Collin, who I met in Louisiana, gave me a cable to keep my phone charged up and his friend Larry, witnessed me in a major panic the morning I arrived. I could not get my phone to work, and honestly, being sleep deprived and just plain out of sorts, samshaya had completely taken over. I was imagining my family at home wondering about me, waiting for my call that never came. Larry calmed me down, fixed my phone and in general, was just a sweet, helpful individual in a moment of crisis.

Classes have begun and my sanity is beginning to return. I do not think I will ever stop marveling at the simple power an asana can have over me. This is the week of standing poses. So far I have had one brilliant class with Geeta and another brilliant class taught my Mr.Iyengar and his granddaughter, Abbi.
The major theme of both of these classes has been the work of the legs. In both classes we have been instructed to not allow ourselves to get carried away with the arms or trunk before stabilizing the legs properly. It's great. A simple thing like working the legs leads to major freedom in the rest of the asana and the entire body. My legs were actually sore when I got out of my flat India bed this morning.
Here's the sequence from the class taught my Mr. Iyengar and Abbi.

Adho Mukha Virasana- we actually spent about 20 minutes working on this pose. This is where they began to establish the work and stabilizing of the legs.

Adho Mukha Svanasana- heels down! inner thighs back!!

Uttanasana

Trikonasana- we did this pose several times. First the instructions were about the legs. An emphasis was put on pushing back strongly with the top of the back thigh. As we did the pose more and more, another action was added, untill we were finally able to experience how the work of the legs made all the actions that followed available.

Parsvakonasana- with an observance on how the torso is more extended than Trikonasana

Trikonasana- now trying to keep the torso long like Parsvakonasana

Prasarita Padottanasana

Sirsasana
Sarvangasana
Paschimottanasana
Uttanasana- feet apart, eyes closed

That's it, no Savasana, just that eyes closed Uttanasana, which was effective. There are not many poses at all in the sequence, but there was so much teaching, so much information and we did Trikonasana several times.

I am typing this post on a very old and crochety computer. It's true role in this world is not to send emails, but to cultivate patience of those wishing to send emails. I feel lucky that it has allowed me this blogging time. Hopefully, I'll get lucky again.

Innvocation to Patanjali

2011-06-11T18:34:00.000-04:00

I have added a new link underneath the Sutra Link list over to the right there. It's audio of the Innvocation to Patanjali.

Supta VIrasana with the Dogs

2011-06-11T18:27:00.001-04:00

DSC00855, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

No Downward Dog

2011-06-11T18:26:00.000-04:00

This is the sequence I did for my own practice this past Friday evening. Sometimes, I sit down and take great care and joy in writing out a sequence for practice, even though it may change a little here and there as I am actually doing it. This sequence just happened without any forethought.
After the first round of Paryankasana and Supta Virasana, I was feeling like I could just fall asleep right there on my sticky mat. So, I jumped up and kicked up into Adho Mukha Vrksasana for a time. That made all the difference and the rest of the practice flowed out naturally.

When I first began my practice years ago, Padmasana was very difficult. My thigh muscles were so tight, they would frequently grip up and cause spasms of pain in my lower back. Too many over-zealous Tae Kwan Do kicks lead me to a ripped groin. Supta Virsaana, Baddha Konasana, Upavistha Konasana, Gomukhasana and Padmasana have been major contributors to the liberation of my legs and back.

Paryankasana- over a brick- low height, then tall height brick
Supta Virasana
Paryankasana- full pose

Adho Mukha Vrksasana
Uttanasana

Ardha Baddha Padma Padottanasana- I did this pose a few times in stages

1st stage- Tadasana with leg up in Ardha Padma

2nd stage- Tadsana with leg up in Ardha Padma

3rd stage- facing wall, walk hands down to floor

4th stage- away from wall, wrap back arm around, go forward. Full pose.

5th stage- full pose

Padmasana
Baddha Padmasana
Matsyasana- no arching, just flat on back w/legs in Padmasana
Simhasana 2
Gorakasana
Matsyasana- full pose

Sirsasana- Urdhva Padmasana in Sirsasana

Urdhva Dhanurasana

Salamba Sarvangasana- dropping over several times to Setu Bandha, working on coming up with both legs at the same time.
Nirlamba Sarvangasana 1
Halasana
Karnapidasana
Savasana

Legs

2011-06-08T14:26:00.000-04:00

Here is a sequence I taught this past Monday. Be patient. Devote time and attention the different stages of each asana. Recognize that the complete whole is made up of smaller, but still vital pieces.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana

Utthita Hasta Padangustasana- several times

   1st time- simply lift knee up toward chest, maintain Tadasana of standing leg

   2nd time- again, lift knee up toward chest, try to lift it higher than the first time

   3rd time- hold big toe, do not use a belt yet. Push the big toe into your fingers and at the same timepull back on the toe, suck that ram into the socket and raise your chest.

Padangusthasana- bend forward, grab your big toes and push the big toes down while you suck the inner arms up and pull with the fingers, from this force, move the chest and ribs forward. Then bend your elbows out to the sides and pull your trunk down, keep up the hands and feet actions

Utthita Hasta Padangusthasana- 1st time-hold foot, do the hand and foot actions from Padangusthasana

2nd time- go for a straight leg, use a belt as needed, but still work the hand and foot.

3rd time- both hands on foot, lift arms up toward sky, carry leg with arm. Still push hand and foot into eachother

4th time- lift arms, lift leg, bend elbows out to the side, extend trunk out over leg.

5th time- lift arms, lift leg, bend elbow out to side, extend trunk over leg, keep hips as level as possible.

Uttanasana- feet together, classic pose

Parsvottanasana- full pose, hands in Paschima Namaskarasana

Prasarita Padottanasana 2- hands in Paschima Namaskarasana- if your head does not touch floor, then bring your hands to floor.

Adho Mukha Vrksasana- 1st time- fingers forward

   2nd time- turn hands out, fingers point out to sides

   3rd time- hands turned back completely, fingers point back toward your feet

   4th time- hands turned back completely, fingers point back toward your feet

Sirsasana- straight pose for about 6 minutes before doing Eka Pada Sirasana- 2 times. The 2nd time, reach leg closer to floor.

Supta Tadasana- feet to wall.

Supta Padangusthasana 1- bottom foot to wall. Recreat all the actions from Utthita Hasta Padangusthasana

Dandasana
Upavistha Konasana- extend arms out, grab big toes, stretch forward
Baddha Konasana
Upavistha Konasana- gain, go forward
Baddha Konasana
Paschimottanasana
Chatushpadasana
Purvottanasana
Salamba Sarvangasana- Halasana, Eka Pada Halasana, Eka Pada Sarvangasana

Setu Bandha Sarvangasana on a brick
Savasana

Go Through the Portal

2011-05-26T09:39:00.000-04:00

This is a sequence with some pretty heavy poses, so stay calm and light-hearted. You need at least 90 minutes to do these poses. Do not skip the Chatushpadasana, Sarvangasana and the brick Setu Bandha at the end of the sequence. You will need those poses to relax your spinal muscles.
If there is a pose or 2 that you have not yet been taught and are uncertain about practicing, substitute another pose in its place. Then, tell us the changes you have made with the comment option that is available at the bottom of every post.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Parsva Adho Mukha Virasana

Jathara Parivartanasana- legs bent, slowly. Work on compacting outer hips and keeping thigh bones moving into their sockets.
Jathara Parivartanasana- legs straight, slowly. Work on compacting outer hips and moving thigh bones into their sockets.
Jathara Parivartanasana-legs straight, quickly, side to side 10x.

Dandasana-Urdhva Hastasana
Parsva Dandasana- 3 or 4x - keep feet in line with one another as you twist. Suck the legs together like the Jathara Parivartanasana

Marichyasana 3- sit in Dandasana with your back to the wall. Be about 16 inches away from the wall. Turn and put your back hand up on the wall, spin that arm out to lift the chest. 2x each side

Dandasana-Urdhva Hastasana-Paschimottanasana- go through this cycle 3 or 4 time then hold Paschimottanasana for 1 minute the last time.

Prasarita Padottanasana- take feet wide, walk hands back, try to get the back of your head on the floor.

Sirsasana- Parsva Sirsasana and Eka Pada Sirsasana

Malasana- lift heels even if you do not need to. Keep legs together, hugs shin bones with forearms and press the arms into the legs to lift the ribs up. Lengthen the trunk.

Malasana 2 - do this pose twice. Look at Light on Yoga p. 266 photo # 322.
Kurmasana- 2x
Eka Pada Sirsasana- 2x- Look at Light on Yoga pp.292-294.

Chatushpadasana- go up and down gently and slowly a few times before holding. Finally after a few pumps, go up into the complete pose.

Salamba Sarvangasana

Setu Bandha Sarvangasana on a brick

Savasana

What is Practice?

2011-05-25T07:29:00.000-04:00

तत्र स्थितौ यत्नो भ्यसः

1.13 tatra sthitau yatnah abhyasah

Practice is the steadfast effort to still these fluctuations.

Practice is the effort to still the fluctuations in the consciousness and then to move towards silencing it: to attain a constant, steady, tranquil state of mind.

Light on Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by BKS Iyengar p.59

Do you practice? Or, do you simply put yourself in different positions a couple of times a week?

What is Asana?

2011-05-20T07:55:00.000-04:00

स्थिर सुखं आसनं

2.46 sthira sukham asanam

Asana is perfect firmness of body, steadiness of intelligence and benevolence of spirit.
translated by BKS Iyengar

Asana is a steady, comfortable posture.
translated by Sri Swami Satchidananda

Posture should be steady and comfortable.
translated by Edwin Bryant

Essentially, the posture is a limb of the actual goal of yoga to the extent that it allows the meditator to sit firmly, sthira, and comfortably, sukha, for meditation. Indeed, as noted, asana literally means seat. Obviously one cannot fix one's attention onto something if one is sleeping or running about; one must sit, and sit without fidgeting or discomfort. In other words, asana's revelance and function for the classical Yoga tradition are to train the body so that it does not disturb or distract the mind of the yogi in any way when sitting in meditation.
The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Edwin Bryant p.284

The postures of meditation should embody steadiness and ease.
translated by Chip Hartranft

Asana must embody steadiness (sthira) and ease (sukha) not only in an active, external sense, as in selecting a posture and support best suited to profound stillness, but also in an interiorized, receptive way. Moment by moment we must allow our awareness of embodiment to deepen, even as each new wave of sensation buffets our attention and threatens to unmoor it from its fixation in the present.
The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by Chip Hartranft p.37

Welcome Home Apollo

2011-05-14T13:00:00.001-04:00

Welcome Home Apollo, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Good Apollo

2011-05-14T12:58:00.000-04:00

Apollo is our 13 week old German Shepherd puppy. We got him from a neighbor who keeps the breed. We now have 3 dogs.

Last Sunday Apollo got very sick. We took him to the emergency vet in Decatur. Upon examination and testing, they found that Apollo had been unlucky enough to catch the Parvo virus. He had previously received 3 Parvo vaccinations, but Parvo is a very hardy virus and found it's way into his system, regardless of the shots. Parvo is a nasty virus that attacks the puppy's digestive tract and immune system. An x-ray showed that Apollo's small intestines were wrinkling up, looking as if it were attacking itself.

He stayed at the vet Sunday night and Monday night where he received medicine and fluids through intravenous tubes. We brought him home Tuesday evening, he had a relapse and had to be brought back to the vet to be again hooked back up to the antibiotics and fluids.
Apollo is now home, he returned yesterday. He is completely recovered, ready to jump into action.

During this past week, my feelings of distress were based on Apollo's discomfort. I was not at all happy that this adorable creature was in pain. Watching a furry 26 pound body spasm and vomit is horrifying.

Sadness felt like a selfish emotion, based on the potential of loss. When I am sad, I also feel greedy. Greedy for something that was taken away, greedy because I want to fill up an emptiness. This time, the greed disgusted me. It was worse than any thoughts of living without this dog. There are so many dogs in this world! There are 2 more healthy dogs back at my house! Because of this, I found I could not be sad at the prospect of losing Apollo. Death is natural and inevitable, why should the laws of nature, why should God make an exception for me. I am not special, Apollo is not special. Nothing about this situation is special. Any feelings of sadness I felt would not be productive or helpful to Apollo. But, I definitely had some unnamed emotions that I felt needed a path.
So, I said to myself, if I feel like do-nothing depressing grief is not helping me or Apollo, what will help?
After that thought, I made a decision. With each inhalation, I lifted my chest and said "live!" And with each exhalation, calmed myself, allowing the sattvic realization that Apollo may not live wash over me. Where ever the soul that inhabits that puppy body went, I decided to give it my love and energy. This practice was much more calming than allowing myself to become overwhelmed with dismay, which would probably lead to hiding under a blanket for awhile in a state of foggy unawareness, only to be roused by hunger, or the need to pee, finding that my black out helped no one, including me.
I found that my efforts to create productive positive thoughts allowed me to better serve the other animals and people that I live with.

Hooked on Props

2011-05-13T14:47:00.000-04:00

Props are fabulous. Props make poses and actions possible.

But, we can get hooked on them to the point of attachment,convincing ourselves that practicing is
downright impossible without props. No props does not have to equal no yoga

I remember when I first became interested in yoga. I was intrigued by the simplicity. All I need is this physical body, these arms and these legs. Now look at me, surrounded by bolsters, blankets, blocks, straps and odd looking wooden benches.
Don't get me wrong, props are amazing, wonderful tools and some things truly cannot be accomplished without them. You won't ever catch me renouncing them. But, we should be using the props as means to a further end. What is that end? Emotional security? Physical complacency?
Use the prop to teach you how to do an action. Do not allow the use of that prop to trap you in a state of laziness.
When is the last time you tried to do Shoulderstand without belting the arms?

When was the last time you practiced Pincha Mayurasana without a brick or belt?
Your elbows do not slide out by some odd natural occurance. The elbows are sliding out because there is still no understanding about how to engage those muscles to perform and maintain the actions needed to keep the elbows in. Perhaps you could train those muscles if you practiced without a belt sometimes.

Are the props you use helping you progress? Or, are the props you use allowing you to fester in a place of what you think is comfort, but upon closer inspection is really laziness?

Does your desire for props bring out the greedy horder in you? Do you collect props before class, in an effort to make certain no one else gets your favorite blanket?

Do you let your practice diminish when you travel, using no props as an excuse?

Examine yourself, examine your environment. Ask yourself, do I really need a prop to do this? Furthermore, what is at my disposal that I can use as a prop if need be?

You may find out how to work your feet and outer hip muscles by doing standing poses on carpet instead of a mat to keep your feet from slipping.

You can backbend over anything!!

You can use towels under your shoulders in shoulderstand.

You can use a phonebook, a flower vase, a water bottle or a roll of toilet paper as a brick if you have to.

If you have props, my all means, use them when you need to, but examine that need constantly. Grow, do not stagnate.
Patanjali lists mental laziness as an obstacle that disturbs our consciousness and disrupts our practice. Styana is the word in Sanskrit. Sometimes survival can force you to be creative and innovative. How quickly do you say , "aw, screw it" before truly making an earnest effort to find a solution or a means?
Well, I don't have a wall, so I cannot practice headstand. What else can you do? How about a doorway?
Don't have anything to sit on for seated poses, what's an acceptable alternative?

Here is a sequence of poses. Most of these can be done without props. Give it a whirl. Make it a practice of non-attachment. Of course if doing any of these poses without a certain prop means your certain doom, then simply do not practice that particular pose. But keeping with the svadyaya(self-study) add an alternative. This means you have to be creative and not allow the obstacle of styana to predominate.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana

Tadasana
Urdhva Hastasana
Urdhva Baddanguliasana
Paschima Namaskrasana
Gomukhasana - arms only

Uttanasana- feet together
Prasarita Padottanasana
Sirsasana

Utthita Trikonasana
Utthita Parsvakonasana- what can you do if you don't have a brick and cannot get to the floor? Put your forearm on your leg.

Virabhadrasana II
Ardha Chandrasana- if your standing leg bends for lack of a brick, the world will not end.

How many standing poses can you do without a brick? Probably all of them.

Virabhadrasana 1
Virabhadrasana 3

Chatushpadasana

Salamba Sarvangsana- this is one pose you should not do without the lift of blankets or something(mats, foam) under your shoulders. So, search your environment, use whatever is available to you. The last time I traveled without props, I was in a hotel room, and I took the comforter off of the hotel bed, folded it up and stuck that under my shoulders to do the pose. If it is not as much lift as you like, then do the pose with your feet on the wall. I am happy to show that way if you are not familiar with it.

After Sarvangasana, doing some seated poses is a good idea, as long as they are not too stimulating to destroy the peacefullness and sattvaness that the pose brings.

Baddha Konasana
Swastikasana
Marichyasana 1
Janu Sirsasana
Before you take a prop, ask yourself why you need it. If you are sitting on a blanket to sit up straighter, actually work to sit up straighter before simply grabbing the prop without actually attempting the action. Very often, we look at something in our bodies as naturally occurring and uncontrollable. Change that, take control. You will be rewarded for your efforts.

Savasana

Sequence

2011-05-07T19:00:00.000-04:00

Here's a sequence of backbends from class at Shambhala Center this past Thursday.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana- do concave stage for a few breaths before lengthening forward completely
Tadasana
Urdhva Hastasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana- do concave stage for a few breaths before lengthening forward

Sirsasana
Setu Bandha on a brick- do this pose actively, no wall for the feet
Urdhva Mukha Svanasana
Dhanurasana
Ustrasana
Urdhva Dhanurasana

Adho Mukha Swastikasana
Parsva Adho Mukha Swastikasana
Supported Ardha Halasana or bolster Halasana

You can run through all of these poses quickly and finish this sequence in 30 minutes. You can hold each pose for a longer time, do them repeatedly and make this sequence last 2 hours.
I am interested to hear from you about the individual experiences that come from these sequences. Certainly when I teach them there are points and efforts that do not get expressed on these posts. Feel free to leave comments.

The Other Times

2011-05-04T15:00:00.000-04:00

व्र्त्तिसरुप्यमितरत्र

1.4 vrtti sarupyam itaratra

At other times, the seer identifies with the fluctuating consciousness.

We spend most of our time, in the "other times".

2011-04-20T10:49:00.001-04:00

IMG_0446, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

We have a mud swamp in our backyard that he loves to play in

2011-04-20T10:48:00.003-04:00

IMG_0430, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

He sleeps and eats

Good Apollo

2011-04-20T10:48:00.001-04:00

DSC00823, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

He is growing like kudzu.

New Family Member

2011-04-20T08:03:00.001-04:00

DSC00812, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

This is Apollo the puppy. He seems to be dwelling in his own true splendor.

True Splendor

2011-04-20T08:01:00.000-04:00

तदा द्रष्टु स्वरूपे वस्थानं

1.3 tada drastuh svarupe vastanam

Then the Seer (Self) abides in His own nature.

Sri Swami Satchidananda

Then (when thought waves are controlled) the seer is established in his own true nature.
Baba Hari Dass

Then, the seer dwells in his own true splendor.
BKS Iyengar

The seer refers to the true self, the soul, the purusa. The life force that exists in all of us, buried deep underneath all the daily bullshit.

"When the waves of consciousness are stilled and silenced, they can no longer distort the true expression of the soul. Revealed in his own nature, the radiant seer abides in his own grandeur.
When it (the mind) is restrained and regulated, a reflective state of being is experienced. In this state, knowledge dawns so clearly that the true grandeur of the seer is seen and felt. The vision of the soul radiates without any activity on the part of the citta (consciousness). Once it is realized, the soul abides in its own seat."
from Light on Yoga Sutras of Patanjali by BKS Iyengar

It is important to notice that BKS Iyengar writes that the seer, the soul, will be established in its own true nature. He distinctly does not say, you. This is because what we identify ourselves with is the fluctuating citta (the mind that won't shut up). We think we are this body and this mind, that goes through our ever so important tasks, driving here, buying this, getting pissed off at that, loving this, hating that, blah blah blah.
Patanjali is telling us that this body is a temporary apartment for the soul. The soul is eternal, undying, unchanging, genderless and has no ice cream preferences. We can begin to make contact with that soul, not by spacing out and drooling all over ourselves, but by hard work (abhyasa and vairagya). As the mind chatter begins to diminish, we are made more capable of glimpsing the soul.

Patanjali Yoga Sutra Links

2011-04-15T08:03:00.001-04:00

I have put up a new link list just for sutra related things. Thanks to Lee and Chiara for sharing the links with the chanting.
If you happen upon any other chanting source that you find helpful, share it with me so I can stick it up here.
You can also purchase cd copies of all the sutras being chanted along with a booklet from the IYNAUS (National Iyengar Association) website. That link is under Links of Interest over there to the right.

Sutras on Sunday

2011-04-13T08:18:00.000-04:00

For all of you who would like to chant sutras on Sunday mornings, we will now begin chanting 10 minutes before class, that's 8:50 am. So, show up, sit down, chant.
If you happen to arrive while chanting is in progress, quietly come into the room, get only what you need to sit, then sit down and join the chanting or be quiet, sit up straight and listen contently.

New Sutra

2011-04-11T16:43:00.001-04:00

अथ योगानुशासनम्

1.1 atha yoganusasanam

With prayers for divine blessings, now begins an exposition of the sacred art of yoga.

This is the first sutra of Patanjali's Yoga Sutras.

I like the immediacy of this sutra. The word 'atha' means now. Not tomorrow, not sometime in the future when I feel like I can handle it, but right now. Many times, I have chanted this sutra to myself when I slip into a state of negligence and procrastination.

When I first decided to have sutra chantings at the start of class, it was because of this sutra. For months I hashed it over in my mind. I would always end up at a place of procrastination. I'll do it soon. The future is fat with the bounty of what we are planning to accomplish.

Then one Sunday morning, after the Innvocation to Patanjali, a sutra just came out of my mouth. It was an 'atha' moment.

Of course, that sutra was not the one I speak of now, but another one of my favorite. I chose it because everyone can certainly relate to it.

tivra samveganam asannah

the goal is near for those who are supremely vigorous and intense in their practice.

Scroll down a few posts to see all the sutras we have covered so far. They all fit together.

Now, yoga will be explained.

The goal is near for those who work towards it with determination and vigor.

Practice and detachment are the means you use to keep you on the path while moving towards this goal.

Yoga is the stopping of the fluctuations of the consciousness.

Self-discipline, study and devotion to God are the main actions you must be practicing while on this path.

Moral injunctions, fixed observances, postures, breath control, sense (eyes, ears, etc) control and withdrawal, concentration, meditation and absorption with your true self are the stages of yoga.

Geetaji - Pada Hastasana

2011-04-04T16:33:00.001-04:00

Geetaji Pada Hastasana 04, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Do You Know?

2011-04-04T14:28:00.000-04:00

वितर्कबाधने प्रतिपक्सभवनं

vitarka badhane pratipaksabhavanam

2.33 Principles which run contrary to yama and niyama are to be countered with the knowledge of discrimination.

Light on Yoga Sutras of Patanjali translated by BKS Iyengar

2.33 Upon being harassed by negative thoughts,one should cultivate counteracting thoughts.

The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali translated by Edwin Bryant

2.33 When disturbed by negative thoughts, opposite (positive) ones should be thought of. This is pratipaksha bhavana.

The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali translated by Sri Swami Satchidananda

2.33 When gripped by the desire to be an asshole, don't.

Yoga Sutras of Patanjali translated by Me, Kquvien DeWeese.

The big question here is are you intelligent and discerning enough to know when thoughts are self-serving negative thoughts or not. Are you more concerned with being harassed or are you more concerned with your harassment of others? What is perfectly painless and natural to you, could be impolite, inappropriate or even harmful to those around you. Consider it.

A quick word here about chanting in class.

On Wednesdays, we have been spending 10 minutes before the beginning of the Vinyasa class at Stillwater chanting. Feel free to join us, even if you are not taking the class.

Allow me to chant the sutra once so that the entire class can hear it and establish the rhythm.

If you are uncomfortable chanting, get over it. But until you get over it, there is nothing wrong with listening to the chanting around you and receiving that experience.

Do not worry or be self-conscious about your voice, or pronunciation. Chanting is a vibrational experience, no one cares how your voice sounds. All the voices in the room join together to create one sound, one vibration. Focus on the meaning of the words as you chant them. The repetition brings clarity, understanding and ultimately change for the better if you allow it.

The Eight Limbs of Yoga

2011-03-28T08:00:00.001-04:00

२.२९ यम नियम असन प्राणायाम प्रत्याहार धारण ध्यान समाधयोश्तवाङ्गानि

2.29 yama niyama asana pranayama pratyahara dharana dhyana samadhayo' stav angani

The eight limbs of yoga are abstentions, observances, posture, breath control, disengagment of the senses, concentration, meditation and absorption.

I am new to learning how to use the Sanskrit font on this blog. So, the retroflex "s" is not in the Devangari as it should be, sorry.

Ganesha, Overcomer of Obstacles

2011-03-24T21:54:00.001-04:00

Ganesh, originally uploaded by tropicalsnaphappy.

2011-03-21T06:58:00.001-04:00

Autumn Aum, originally uploaded by babka_babka.

Sutra Class

2011-03-21T06:54:00.000-04:00

Saturday, March 26, 2011, 2pm- 4:30pm at Stillwater Yoga Studio in Midtown. $20. The class will consist of discussion, chanting then finish with some restoratives and pranayama. It's a lovely way to spend a Saturday afternoon.

Please bring a translation of Patanjali's Yoga Sutras with you to class.

Baddha Padmasana

2011-03-20T13:42:00.001-04:00

Baddha Padmasana, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

What Are You Practicing?

2011-03-20T13:41:00.001-04:00

तपः स्वाध्याय इस्वरप्रनिधनानि क्रियायोगः

2.1 tapah svadhyaya Isvarapranidhanani kriyayogah

Burning zeal in practice, self-study and study of scriptures, and surrender to God are the acts of yoga.

For Patanjali, the practice of yoga is the 'yoga of action', kriya yoga, composed of tapas, self-discipline, svadhyaya, self study and Isvara pranidhana, surrender to God.

Just like we all have certain methods and habits with everyday tasks, we also allow ourselves to have habits of comfort in yoga practice.
Do you practice the same poses, the same way, in the same order in the same place most of the time? Change terrifies us, but improvement cannot happen without change.
When you attend class, do you always place your mat on the same side of the room, always more to the front or back? Try simply setting your mat up on the other side of the room. Change can be exciting and bring unexpected joy, but only if you allow it to.
Do you practice only poses that you think come easily?

Padmasana would not be so difficult if you practiced it more often.

Kicking up into a handstand would not be so difficult if you took 10 minutes each day to practice kicking up 7 or 8 times.

Don't like backbends? Make them your best friend. Devote yourself to practicing backbends at least twice a week.

Hamstrings tight? Do Supta Padangusthasana, 6 days a week.

Can't do Chaturanga Dandasana? Every morning, work on the pose for 5 minutes.

When you regularly practice the poses that you say you cannot do, that you 'don't like', an amazing thing begins to happen. You get stronger, the poses become fuller and you actually begin to enjoy them, as well as enjoying the process of bettering yourself.

When I first began Iyengar yoga, I could not do Salamba Sarvangasana (shoulderstand) and most backbends. The actions of the poses eluded me. Having grown up on a farm and doing heavy manual labor most of my life, my upper body was bound up and stiff.

I began a morning routine that involved pushing up in to Urdhva Dhanurasana 20 times and holding Sarvangasana for 10 minutes. For weeks my lower back and shoulders screamed at me. I did not blindly push through these poses. I did them trying to accomplish the actions that my teachers taught me. My elbows flew out in my backbend, each time I pushed up, I worked on keeping them in. When I got too tired, I would take a one or two minute break before continuing.
Eventually, I was able to keep my elbows in when doing Urdhva Dhanurasana, and lift my lower back off of my hands in shoulderstand. It took time and hard pain staking work, but I love those poses now.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Dandasana- actually do this pose!
Paripurna Navasana- 5x
Chaturanganga Dandasana- 5x

Adho Mukha Svanasana-time yourself, go for 4 minutes or 2x at 2 minutes each
Uttanasana
Adho Mukha Vrksasana- 6x
Uttanasana- feet together
Utkatasana-hold for 1 minute
Virabhadrasana 1 into Virabhadrasana 3- 2x each side, be sure to actually do Virabhadrasana 1 before moving into Virabhadrasana 3

Sirsasana- Eka Pada Sirsasana- do the varation 2x

Makrasana-3x
Urdhva Mukha Svanasana- 3x
Bhoujangasana- 3x
Bhekasana- Yes! Bhekasana- 2x
Parsva Dhanurasana- 2x each side

Ustrasana
Chatushpadasana
Salamba Sarvangasana- dropping over into Setu Bandha and coming back up. Try to drop over 10x

Bharadvajasana 1- 2x
Paschimottanasana- supported for 3 minutes

Savasana- do Savasana, turn off the lights or cover your eyes. Try to stay there and settle yourself at least 5 minutes.

Sutras

2011-03-02T20:44:00.000-05:00

We have been chanting sutras at the start of class after the Invocation to Patanjali. Chanting is an excellent way to bring your mind to a clear, focused state. Chant the words of the sutras, and believe in the words as you chant them. Absorb yourself in the words and their meanings. Keep the words in your memory to recall in times of adversity.
Here are the sutras we have chanted so far.

योगस चित्तव्र्त्ति निरोधः

1.2 yogas cittavrtti nirodhah

Yoga is the cessation of the movements of the consciousness.

अभ्यास वैराग्याभ्यां तन्निरोधः

1.12 abhyasa vairagyabhyam tannirodhah

Practice and detachment are the means to still the fluctuations of the consciousness.

तिव्रसंवेगानां आसन्नः

1.21 tivrasamveganam asannah

The goal is near for those who are supremely vigorous and intense in their practice.

2011-02-05T20:43:00.000-05:00

Ksana tatkramayoh samyamat vivekajam jnanam

By samyama (uninterrupted atttention of dharana, dhyana and samadhi together) on the moment and on the continuous flow of moments, the yogi gains exalted knowledge, free from the limitations of time and space.

One of the reasons why, as a teacher of asana, I am so intense, and was in the past even harsh, is that I want to give the students one and a half hours of present life in a lesson. As I shout at them to straighten their legs in Sirsasana (headstand), they cannot be wondering what is for dinner or flee the present, one hour's experience of 'now' can be daunting, even exhausting, and I wonder if the fatigue felt by some students after lessons is due more to that than the work of performing asanas. Our perpetual mental absences are like tranquilizing drugs, and the habit dies hard.

Light on the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali pp. 220-221 by BKS Iyengar

Geetaji in Rajakapotasana

2011-02-05T20:23:00.001-05:00

Geetaji & Guruji05, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Geetaji Vrschikasana #2

2011-02-05T20:22:00.001-05:00

Geetaji Vrschikasana 2 01, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

2011-01-30T15:06:00.001-05:00

AUM, originally uploaded by ammassridhar.

Be willing

2011-01-30T15:01:00.000-05:00

I said good bye to my oldest friend a week ago; Quigley, a complete mutt. She was born literally on top of my stomach 16 years ago. I woke up from a sound sleep to find her mother, a pit bull husky mix, smack on top of me, birthing her puppies. Quigley was with me through homelessness, drunken mis-adventures and failed jobs before I married my fabulous husband, Sean and settled into a stable existence through Iyengar Yoga.
After we sent Quigley on her way, later that day I did an intense inversion and backbend practice to strengthen my nervous system and gain some courage. Still with me are 2 dogs and 8 cats. That number is likely to naturally rise or fall as certain animals befall a natural tragedy or we take in some new member.
Living with animals teaches us compassion. In fact, compassion is required. How would you feel about yourself if you knew that you were willingly mistreating an animal? If I have the capacity to love, feed and house an animal, I believe I should, so I do. At times, I even find myself feeling guilty, thinking, perhaps I could handle more. But I know I need to have a limit somewhere, lest my teaching and practice suffer.

Throughout this past week, I found myself curious; examining my reactions and emotions. My reaction to this death made me stay in asanas longer, trying to go deeper physically, so as to perhaps answer some question. Why am I sad? The love still exists, just not the recipient of that love. Why is any kind of change or interruption so painful to adjust to?
Pain can be our teacher. One of the most difficult aspects of delving deeper is to accept the idea of being unsatisfied over and over again. Santosa is often translated as contentment, but also as acceptance for what is, not what we think is reality, but what truly is reality. Sage Patanjali warns us to not be greedy, with aparigraha being a yama, a moral and social discipline. When this delving deeper brings us to this place of emptiness, Isvarapranidhana (surrender to God) is the saving grace to keep us out of the daurmanasya (despair). But we may find that difficult because our asmita(ego) asks questions, forms excuses and arguments and then moves to another comfortable place of ignorance(avidya).
I truly believe that the life force within each creature moves on to another physical form after death. Whether that is actually true or not is unproven scientifically. So, I accept that what I would like to be true may not be and don't waste anymore energy on it. If I look back I am lost. Do not succumb to samshaya (fear, doubt).
In life and in practice, being willing and receptive is important. Be willing to feel the sadness. Be willing to adjust to the change. Relax. Be receptive and open to the idea that the way things were, although familiar and comfortable, no longer matters. There is the new pose now, and only my attitude will determine my success. Citta vikshepa is a distracted, unpleasant disposition. Citta prasadana is the sattva quality manifesting.When in a pose, inhale, exhale, delve deeper, be willing to make a small change here, perhaps a major adjustment , then moving deeper, getting closer.
Practice these forward bends with these ideas. Stay calm, inhale, exhale, be willing to go deeper. Exist in a different place, willingly, peacefully, sattvically.

Supta Padangusthasana 1 & 2
Supta Padangusthasana 1, 2 & 3
Supta Padangusthasana 1- full pose, lift head, bring leg close to face

Uttanasana- feet together-2 minutes
Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana- 1st time just bring Padma leg up
2nd time bend forward
3rd time, full pose, wrap arm around to grab foot, or use a belt

Paschimottanasana- 2 minutes
Malasana 1
Marichyasana 1
Triang Mukha Eka Pada Paschimottanasana
Malasana 2 -wraps arms, grab back of ankles
Janu Sirsasana
Ardha Baddha Padma Paschimottansana- twice, wrap arm around both times
Marichyasana 2- I have been teaching this, but if you have not been taught it yet, practice Kurmasana instead
Paschimottanasana

Adho Mukha Svanasana
Padangusthasana- concave back only
Adho Mukha Vrksasana
Sirsasana
Chatuspadasana
Salamba Sarvangasana
Setu bandha on a brick
Savasana

Happy!

2011-01-20T09:52:00.001-05:00

I swam through a nasty swamp to get to this point here today. Starting around the beginning of December, I got a nasty stomach virus that lasted about 2 weeks and lead to Shingles. If you have never had Shingles, my advice to you is this: don't get it. It is very annoying and unpleasant. After I got rid of the Shingles, my husband and I both got the flu at the same time. This flu was 2 weeks of the most horrible body aches ever, a headache that made me suicidal and an intense burning sensation in both ear canals, both nostrils and throat. It was hilarious.
The first 3 days of the sickness I could not do any kind of yoga practice at all. I tried. Even the most mild restorative pose was unbearable. I was just creating new pathways for the pain to infect. I forced myself to do a few restoratives, thinking that if I stuck it out, it would eventually improve, I only spread pain. Finally after the 3rd day, I was able to do a restorative practice, even though it seriously took me 5 minutes to get into Halasana on the chair.
I was actually starting to become a little concerned that I would still have the stinking flu during my assessment, but finally, the day before the test, I started feeling better. By the actual day of the test, I was feeling absolutely fabulous after feeling like such crap for so bloody long.
So, I passed the test and am happy to be here typing away. Here is a sequence from the Wednesday (Jan. 16) night Vinyasa class at Stillwater.

Supta Tadasana
Supta Padangusthasana 1

Abdominal work: Urdva Prasarita Padasana-one leg at a time, switching back&forth several times
Lift head and shoulders off floor, keep switching legs, pulling lifted leg into face- several times

Supta Padangusthasana 1, 2, Parivrtta and 3 all the the same side

Vinyasa: Tadasana-Urdhva Hastasana-Uttanasana-Adho Mukha Svanasana- Plank pose-Chaturanga Dandasana- Adho Mukha svanasana- Tadasana- Several times

Vrksasana-2x
Garudasana-2x
Ardha Baddha Padmottanasana- full pose, holding foot, arm wrapped behind

Vinyasa: Adho Mukha Svanasana-Uttanasana- Chaturanga Dandasana- Trikonasana- Ardha Chandrasana- Parsvkonasana

Marichyasana 2-2x
Matsyasana-full pose
Adho Mukha Vrksasana-hold for 2 minutes
Sirsasana- Baddha Konasana in Sirsasana

Viparita Dandasana, feet up on chair
Viparita Dandasana, feet on floor
Urdhva Dhanurasana into Viparita Dandasana back up into Urdhva Dhanurasana

Adho Mukha Svanasana
Wide leg Uttanasana
Parsvottansana
Parivrtta Trikonasana-front leg bent slightly
Salamba Sarvangasana
Halasana
Savasana

Urdhva Padmasana in Sirsasana

2011-01-15T18:08:00.001-05:00

DSC00730, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

This is me smiling upside down.

Urdhva Kukkutasana

2010-12-23T21:30:00.001-05:00

DSC00703, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

Be Prepared

2010-12-23T21:25:00.000-05:00

I am presently preparing to take my 4th Iyengar Yoga assessment test. This test will be for the Intermediate Junior 2 level. For the first time since I began teaching Iyengar Yoga and taking these tests, I feel as if I have been preparing for this for years. Before I decided to take this test- while I was in India, while I was reading the Yoga Sutras, while I was practicing asana and pranayama- everything I have been doing has been in preparation for this test. Everything has been leading up to the weekend of January 8, 2011. I hope it's enough. I hope it doesn't all spill out of me once the test is over leaving me empty and dry. I hope this test will only prepare me for the next one.
These tests are difficult for everyone involved. These tests force us, the teachers being tested, to stick to a list of poses, confine ourselves to a time limit, and look with a closer eye at anything that may be going awry in class. One might say that it crushes the creative spirit, that it does not allow us to be in the moment, and that the discipline is stifling. In fact, it's the opposite; the precision that it demands is liberating. The self-discipline that it cultivates is empowering.
The Upanishads say that the Self is not realized by a weakling. Without the discipline of Iyengar Yoga, would we be where we are now? Aren't most of our complaints based on laziness and our desire to move out of a disciplined practice, so we may have a moment of what we think is freedom. What are the true obstacles? Mental laziness, physical laziness, some form of sensual gratification, and our unwillingness to put forth the work required to maintain progress. Patanjali even lists disease as an obstacle. Whatever the hurtle is, working to overcome it is how we learn.
Sometimes we learn things that we aren't too happy about. Through my years of teaching I've learned that I am impatient, demanding, and have an ego that wears a giant red furry hat. The assessment tests have forced me to face these issues and deal with them so that I could evolve. Nothing that I have done would be possible without students. So, thank you, to all of you who endure me week after week. Without your evolution and growth, God only knows where I'd be now.

So, changing gears just a little, here is a sequence of forward bends. Simple poses held for a long time with intense actions.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana
Utthita Trikonasana
Uttanasana-feet together
Parsvottanasana
Sirsasana-eka pada
Salamba Sarvangasana- halasana and eka pada halasana before going up into straight pose
Supta Konasana
Upavistha Konasana
Baddha Konasana- belt feet, pull on belt to open chest
Dandasana
Janu Sirsasana
Ardha Baddha Padma Paschimottanasana
Dandasana
Virasana
Vidrasana- like Virasana with feet together, belt heels together
Dandasana
Triang Mukhaikapada Paschimottanasana
Chatushpadasana- Little lifts a few times before lifting up fully
Setu bandha Sarvangasana- on a brick feet to wall as high s needed
Savasana

Yoga with the Noble Burt

2010-12-18T15:53:00.001-05:00

BurtBlankets, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

This is Kristen's cat, Burt. If your cats decides to curl up on your Yoga blankets, it is okay to wake them up so you can practice. I know it's tempting to let them remain peaceful and cute, but our practice of vairagya (detachment) is best conditioned in our everyday encounters with normal happenings. Your cat sleeping on your props is not a sign from God that you should skip your practice for that day. It's a sign from God that you need to detach yourself from things that please your senses, like watching your cute sleeping cat, and get to some asana or pranayama practice. It would not hurt to get a nice soft blanket just for your cat either.

2010-11-26T20:33:00.001-05:00

DSC00715, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

My dogs never miss a chance to practice restorative poses.

Restoratives Maybe in Order

2010-11-26T20:29:00.000-05:00

Whenever you are feeling out of sorts, stressed out or even sick, a restorative practice can be of great benefit to you. All too often I hear students tell me how they did no practice during a sickness. It is important to note that Patanjali puts disease (vyadhi) at the top of the list of obstacles in sutra 1.30. Vyadhi will be acompanied by alasya and styana(physical and mental laziness).
When dealing with a nasty cold or bronchial distress, inversions and supported backbends help us expel the unwanted mucus. For stomach and digestive ailments, nothing beats supine poses. Supported forward bends can alleviate a headache.
The most effort you have to expend for a restorative practice is folding blankets for your set up. It's well worth it. Even if you do not have time to devote to an entire restorative practice, 15 minutes in a supine pose or Viparita Karani can leave you feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.
There is no need to return to your practice stiff and rigid after a sickness. While restorative poses are not as physically demanding as other asanas, they are still poses that open and extend our physical bodies. The restorative poses also allow you to relax and cultivate smoother breathing.
This is a general restorative sequence. Leave out the inversions if you are menstruating or don't feel that they will benefit you at the particular time.

Supta Baddha Konasana
Supta Virasana
Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana
Sirsasana
Salamba Sarvangasana on a chair if you have one
Paschimottanasana-use as much support as needed
Janu Sirsasana-supported
Upavistha Konasana- support front torso and forehead, use as much as needed, even a chair
Setu Bandha Sarvangasana- use blankets or bolsters
Viparita Karani (legs up the wall)
Savasana

Please do not ever hesitate to contact me with questions about your practice, poses or set ups for props. Remember I have added a link to a pose index to help you. It's under Links over there down to the right.

Pose Index

2010-11-15T07:59:00.002-05:00

I have added the link to the Pose Index that Yoga Journal has up and running. Just scroll down to the right and you'll find it.

Cookie Offer

2010-11-15T07:38:00.000-05:00

About the last post... I failed to mention that after my pranayama practice, after cleaning up the below mentioned, I went outside and stepped in some more. It was a rainy day and none of the animals wanted to go outside, that's how I translated that shitty morning anyway.
On another note, here's a sequence.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana
Jathara Parivartanasana
Supta Padangusthasana I
Parivritta Supta Padangusthasana
Supta Padangusthasana III
Uttanasana- feet together
Parivritta Trikonasana- 2x
Vimanasana
Parivritta Parsvakonasana-2x
Marichyasana III- 2x, wrap arms
Sirsasana- Parsva Sirsasana
Salamba Sarvangasana
Setu Bandha Sarvangasana -on a brick
Savasana

Now I have an offer for all of you. From now until Christmas if you bring to me a hand written sequence of poses that you practiced, I will give you a big chocolate chip cookie. Here are the requirements:

The sequence must be hand written.

The sequence should have a minimum of 10 poses.

The poses should be written in the order performed.

At least 5 of the poses should be written in Sanskrit.

Be prepared to answer one question, asked by me, about your sequence.

This is a chance for you to discipline yourself both in your asana practice and your learning of the pose names. This is also a chance for you to learn how to make a sequence. Think about poses that seem to naturally fit together. Look at some of the sequences on this blog to get ideas. If you do not have a book, please consider getting one. Until then, the Yoga Journal website has an asana index that maybe of help to you. Don't worry about making errors, just have fun with it.

2010-11-11T13:01:00.001-05:00

om symbol, originally uploaded by useitinfo.

Shitty Day (literally)

2010-11-04T23:28:00.000-04:00

I woke up this morning to the sweet smell of cat shit. Found 3 piles NOT in the liter box. Cleaned 'em up. About 5 minutes later one of my dogs pissed on the floor, cleaned it up. About 5 minutes later I found that one of the cats had pissed all over my desk during the night, cleaned it up.
Finally. All piss and shit cleared out.
I settled in to a pranayama practice. About 20 minutes in, one of the cats took a good crap about 5 feet away from me. Did not clean it up, kept practicing.
Forgot about the cat crap, inhaled, didn't smell it. No problem. Exhale.
Forgot about the cat crap, inhaled, didn't smell it. No problem. Exhale.
Remembered the cat crap, inhaled, agh, good God, smelled it, what a problem.
Interesting. If I did not focus on it, I could not smell it. Good, no problem, keep practicing.

Do Your Inversions!

2010-10-14T21:47:00.000-04:00

If you are wishing to begin practicing Sirsasana, (headstand), you need to have a strong Salamba Sarvangasana (shoulderstand) first. Make a point to practice your inversions 3 times a week, minimum. Once you can hold Salamba Sarvangasana for 5 minutes easily and have been doing so for 6 months, then you can begin Sirsasana. Here is a sequence of poses leading to Sarvangasana.

Adho Mukha Virasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana
Adho Mukha Svanasana
Uttanasana
Parsvottanasana
Prasarita Padottanasana
Padangusthasana
Chatushpadasana
Salamba Sarvangasana
Setu Bandha Sarvangasana on a brick
Savasana

I wish I had the time to post more often. Please remember that I share a computer with my husband who is in a doctorate program right now. I will be posting more sequences up here over the weekend, so please make a point to check back.

Share your props!

2010-10-06T08:03:00.001-04:00

pete on blankets 128, originally uploaded by deweesescience.

This is Pete, a majestic creature who shares his house with Scott. Pete is very generous and allows Scott to occasionally use his blankets to practice asana.